Oct 5, 2025: comfortably uncomfortable

Thank God for another Sunday. The theme for today’s sermon was “comfortably uncomfortable”. This has had me reflect what’s happened in the last few months (and everything that’s happened over the years) and it genuinely has been the biggest metaphorical slap across the face (though, I’m sure there’s a small group of people who wish I did get slapped across the face). There’s a bunch that I’d rather clarify in a podcast episode and not here. There’s some things that have happened that I’ve honestly been nervous talking about. What would my friends think? What would my enemies say? Will I be able to forgive for everything that’s been said and done? Will I be forgiven for things I’ve said and done? Well, rest assured… I’m comfortable with being uncomfortable.

The main point of moving back to Georgia has been my attempt on rekindling with the rest of my family and hope things can be better. They haven’t been. My mother can’t seem to take any accountability for her actions. My sibling can’t seem to form any opinion or achieve a single critical thought that’s not their mother’s. I’ve about reached my wits end with it all. How do I forgive someone that doesn’t see an issue with their choices and the affects it has? Why am I to be assumed to be THE ONLY ONE to do it? Is this expected from me for everyone? Why do I get to carry that weight? It’s not mine.

Do I have my remorses for things I’ve said to and about my mother? Absolutely.

Do I wish my sibling fought more for the sibling bond we share? Absolutely.

These are things that are too foreign, too far gone. They don’t care about if I’m alive. They don’t care to make an effort to have a relationship with my child… and we live an hour and a half away.

My advice to them if they read this: if you don’t want me talking about it, maybe don’t do the bad things I might mention. Make the effort to have us in your life before it’s too late. I’ve already uprooted my life for this. I won’t make a single effort more. Most importantly… I will not take more accountability for my actions than I already have.

So while I do my drives back and forth to Gwinnett, I understand that I may not be wanted back (at least in familial ways), understand that I’m comfortable with feeling uncomfortable about that. I won’t apologize for my existence. Who I am, what I’ve been through… is an incredible thing. If you know, you know.

And I will never stop talking about it.

Until next time, I’ll leave here with today’s Bible verse:

“All praise to God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. God is our merciful Father and the source of all comfort. He comforts us in all our troubles so that we may comfort others. When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us.”

2 Corinthians 3-4

Celebrate what makes you happy always,

Jenna/Starshine ✨

Sept 28, 2025: a decade of survivorship 💜

It’s Sunday. God’s day. It’s not just any Sunday though. Today marks ten years of my own survivorship. I was diagnosed with Stage 2 Hodgkin’s lymphoma and it completely changed my life. There’s so much I’ve learned from that experience and have shared some of those things countless times over the last decade. One thing I was never prepared to do and am now taking the time to do… is the grieving process.

Grief for losing the sense of normalcy I had then.

Grief for the hopes and dreams I placed on hold.

Grief for the relationships that supported me then now wishing the cancer would come back to me.

My funniest comment was from someone I’ve never met who told me to “fix my perm.” 🤣 A few things about this: when I was growing up, I used to HATE my curly hair. I thought straightening my hair would make me seem more mature. I was in such a rush to grow up. It was soon right after my first round of chemotherapy that my hair started falling out in clumps. I ultimately decided to shave my head and rock the “Tommy Pickles” hairstyle. Since then, I’ve grown it out. I’ve colored many different colors (pink, purple, blue to name a few). I’ve had an undercut. I’ve had to grow out that undercut. I’ve maintained my side shave since 2019. It will always serve as my reminder for everything I’ve gone through. It signifies the struggles of a cancer diagnosis and the insecurities faced by MILLIONS that lose their hair due to treatment. I’ve adopted my current hair are routine from a waitress at a Red Robin in Jacksonville, FL and have embracing my curls ever since. This isn’t a perm. It’s not even my natural hair. It’s my chemo hair. They’re my curls from chemo that I’ve grown, altered, colored, cut, buzzed, etc. It’s MINE. And I’ve finally fallen in love with that about myself.

To the people who wonder if I’m still here, yes I am. To the people who wish for it to make its return, you have some unsettled business that you’ve yet to find your peace on. In Jesus’ name, I pray for you each.

So while my past has been haunting, and some parts of who I am today are a little embarrassing, and what happens tomorrow or even next week terrifies me, I know Jesus has my back. He is my Lord and Savior. He was then. He is now. He will be forever.

Ephesians 3:19-21

Until next time, I’ll leave here with three things that make me happy:

Impromptu weddings, listening to my child laugh, stepping on that crunch leaf in the fall.

Celebrate what makes you happy always,

Jenna/Starshine ✨

Sept 15, 2025: WSPD 2025/Recent Affairs.

It’s Monday, happiness crusaders! Glory to God!

This past week specifically has had me in such a mental cloud. Nothing is making sense, there’s so much negativity and hatred in the world, and it feels like I’ve been driving a struggle bus right through a thriving society. Let me personally send my condolences to anyone that lost a friend, father, mother, brother, sister, etc. this past week. Again, there’s so much negativity and none of it makes sense. It’s not what Jesus calls us to do.

I keep wanting to do these blips on Facebook, falling into the tendencies of when I was 14-15. It’s partially why I’m so hesitant on putting anything on social media these days. To say I’ve been met with loud oppositions is a bit of an understatement. It’s cool though. I took the broken pieces of this mosaic that I call “my life”, rebuilt it to be something incredibly beautiful and God-filled, and grabbed a big ol bag of self-confidence on the way back to Georgia. There was a lot I was excited to see/do again. There was a lot of anxiety knowing I’d return to everything that I either broke or it broke me. Here’s a few things I’ve come to terms with:

Those I grew up with aren’t as forgiving as they’ve led themselves to be. Only I can blame myself for my past actions for causing that resentment. It’s always “forgive me Jenna, for I’ve done wrong… BUT I WILL NEVER FORGIVE YOU!” and I think that’s really telling on those people.

I’m also a lot more nostalgic than I already believed about myself. Along with the negativity that this town/county curates and holds, I was blessed to cross paths with certain individuals in my time. I’m grateful to be able to connect with some of those people on social media, but if that’s as far as it’s going to go… respectfully, stay over there. If you prefer the virtual presence of me and not me physically, you have no room in my life.

My capability to love has changed a lot over the years. There was a lot that I tolerated that I shouldn’t have. There’s things I’ve said and done that I wouldn’t dare trying again. Love is a choice. It’s a consistent, conscious choice. People around me seem to lose grasp of that concept. I’m blessed to be surrounded by those who haven’t lost sight of that and show me every single day, that love persists. I’m blessed to have my daughter who shows me the significance and importance on keeping and maintaining my relationships with my gal pals. For allowing me to be the mother I’ve always needed and wanted. I’m forever grateful for you, G. 💖

Needless to say, I was excited to come back to GA to see and reunite with so many people. It turns out literally only 3 people were excited with me. People change. They hold different values. Life happens. I do often wonder if I “grabbed myself by my boot straps” and stayed in FL, if that would have any greater affect on my relationships with the 3 people. Would I be happier?

This all has been weighing heavily on me the last few months. Rejection and dismissal of your thoughts and feelings isn’t a good feeling.

Until next time, I’ll leave here with three things that make me happy:

Thanksgiving dinner, baking desserts just for the heck of it, the color purple.

Celebrate what makes you happy always,

Jenna/Starshine ✨

Sept 7, 2025: life is full of ebbs & flows.

Happy Sunday, happiness crusaders!🌻💖

Thank you Jesus for this day and every day.

What I wanted to be a daily routine for myself became something that was, in a sense, uninspired to me. For what feels like my entire upbringing, I was always terrified of speaking my truth publicly. What if someone that knows of me were to rebuke my claims? What if someone from my past wants to make fun of me? What if someone were to see this and cast their judgements on me and my family? For very specific people (who will remain unnamed) to tell me: “Jenna, stop talking. You’re stupid. You don’t know what you’re talking about.” is a very wild thing to do. How is someone going to tell me my perspective is wrong? Who is anyone to tell me that certain experiences didn’t hurt me, heal me, or teach me something new? There’s only one person who reserves that right. His name is Jesus. ✝️

Today’s church visit was awesome. My daughter came with me for her first time at Frais in Athens. We celebrated someone’s baptism while it’s this church’s last baptism at this specific location. Frais is getting ready to move to a whole new location while celebrating TWO YEARS as a church. Seeing community come together for something greater than any of us has truly been a blessing. I’ve only been a visitor of this church a few times and have had the absolute honor of meeting Sammy & Brittany, the pastor and his wife. Today’s sermon brought to us by Sammy who made a significant point of preaching that our individual stories are nothing without Jesus.

This is the entire premise of who I am, what I’m about, what WMMH is about, what I’d like my podcast to be about. While I have walked this path of life, my testimony is always Jesus. Jesus was with me during my deepest, darkest struggles with my mental health. Jesus was with me during my parent’s divorce and other family issues. Jesus was with me during my cancer diagnosis in 2015. Jesus was with me before becoming a mother, being a single parent, and continues on my journey of motherhood with me. For years, this has been something I’ve fought against. It’s a concept I genuinely believed I wasn’t deserving or didn’t believe this was a lifestyle for me. I didn’t start making my relationship with Jesus until right before we moved from Florida. I’m thankful for my little community there that brought me closer to Him. (Joanna L. specifically)

I’m super excited to get into podcast studio to start recording my testimony and give the opportunity for others to speak their testimony, letting Jesus into the conversation, and bring the church to people.

If you’re seeing all of this for the first time, welcome. I’m so glad you’re here. I do want to recognize that my testimony is my own. It’s my perspective. My emotions. My thoughts. With Jesus. If this upsets you, ask yourself why it does. If this offends you, look the other way. I’ve spent a great majority of my upbringing being silent for others to feel comfortable and I’m not meant to fit inside anyone’s mold they have for me. I’m limitless with Jesus. He ultimately wants immeasurably more. Not just for me, but for you. For What Makes Me Happy.

Until next time, I’ll leave here with today’s Bible verse (obtained from Frais):

“How will anyone know that you look favorably on me — on me and your people — if you don’t go with us? For your presence among us sets your people and me apart from all the other people on Earth.”

Exodus 33:16

Three things that make me happy:

mid-day naps, fresh laundry, a cooperative hair day.

Celebrate what makes you happy always,

Jenna/Starshine ✨

Sept 3, 2025: unpacking and reorganizing

Happy HumpDay crusaders! 🌻💖

Yesterday’s post really had me doing some heavy self-reflecting. I can’t stress the importance and significance of having a community that sees you, listens to you, and shows you grace. Without my brothers and sisters in Christ, I’d be walking this path blindly and confusingly. I had one of my best friends tell me semi-recently that I’m a “vocal processor”. That would make a lot of sense as this exists.

Let me speak metaphorically. Let’s say we’re all back at school (the school of life that is!) and we all have a bookbag. We carry books of love and knowledge. We put the art work we made in class inside. We put the notes from your friends you’d pass in class. You go through life putting through so much in your bookbag. Some of those things, you grow out of. You grow up not needing (or even wanting) certain things in your bookbag.

My bookbag was one I got when I moved to Florida. I carried the time I spent with my father. The relationships I formed, destroyed, and neglected. I hold the guilt I have with losing what I called my “big girl job”. I hold the disappointment in myself for not asking for help when I needed it. I hold the relationships my daughter and I have formed together in a sacred, special pocket. There’s a lot of other things I don’t care to ever mention. Let’s just say, after my conversation last night with a certain brother and sister in Christ (love you 5ever A&J!), it’s okay to “go through the feels” just to go through the feels. There IS a better tomorrow. There ARE opportunities to grow, be better, and do better. There IS grace to give even when you feel like you’ve reached your limit.

Until tomorrow, I’ll leave here with today’s Bible verse:

“Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other s that you may be helaed. The earnest prayer of a righteous person has great power and produces wonderful results.”

James 5:16

Three things that make me happy:

being back in ATL for what I call “concert season”, framed pictures, dancing in the rain

Celebrate what makes you happy always,

Jenna/Starshine ✨

Sept 2, 2025: hard truths to face

Happy Tuesday happiness crusaders! 🌻💖

It’s been a slow and productive day at work. I’ve only been at this job for a little over 30 days now and am still getting used to learning everything and taking on the job. My office is in Duluth, GA which (if you know) I used to work a LOT of food service jobs in this area in the past…. what I’ll start calling my past GA life. It what seems like everyone remembers me by and truthfully… it’s been hurtful. To be told, “Jenna, you need psychiatric help,” “Jenna, go talk to a therapist,” “Try journaling, Jenna!” and while those are all solid options, none of those came close to consoling in Jesus. He has been the one consistent power in my life that has literally kept me going (that and the love of my framily). Being back home in Gwinnett has had me reflecting on my time in Florida. My community there. My daughter’s friends and her school.

I know I’m responsible for a lot of hurt I’ve caused to others and the hurt I’ve put on myself. I’ve carried it on me like a bookbag for years. I guess this blog is my attempt to “unload my backpack”. All I can truly do is accept that for what is, share my apologies, do better, and move on.

My podcast though? I had someone ask me what my goal was for it and it genuinely had me thinking. WMMH was meant to be the bridge between people who need and deserve mental health care and provide the safe space and resources they need. It was recently that I came to terms with God made this all possible. My goal? I want to bring the church to people. I want to bring the word of God while providing the safe space to share testimonies (this sounds this should be a Reddit thread?!). I’m itching to answer for the unspoken. What’s happened and why it stopped. Until then, I’ll leave here with today’s Bible verse:

“Keep on asking, and you will receive what you ask for. Keep on seeking, and you will find. Keep on knocking, and the door will be opened to you.”

Matthew 7:7

Three things that make me happy:

discovering new-to-me music, margaritas, canvas paintings

Celebrate what makes you happy always,

Jenna/Starshine ✨

Happy Labor Day 2025

Happy Monday my fellow happiness crusaders 🌻💖

If you’re new here (new to me and what WMMH is all about), we take Mondays that are known to be feeling “blue” and being lethargic from weekend fun. Some may know me to wear yellow on Mondays. It’s my attempt to bring the happiness to Mondays by simply just wearing the color yellow. This has proven me to be exceptionally helpful in my own journey to mental wellness.

Soon, I’d like to start my podcast journey and have it start with me answering for some unspoken things. A lot has happened in the last six years and I’d love to take a chance to sit down and answer questions about it. WMMH had a growing presence on its Facebook group and I’ve been keeping it all to a minimum and making this what would be like the Facebook page/group. For now, I can definitely say that I’m looking to remove the WMMH name from Facebook and wanting to be its own identity… starting here.

Theres alot recently I’ve been struggling to deal with, but I know with God by my side and having and feeling His love… nothing else really matters (queue Kelsea Ballerini). While I struggle to realize that my efforts in trying have been exhausted, I understand that the power I hold to love so fiercely is still just as strong as it was when this all started. I find peace in knowing that… it is well with my soul.

Three things that make me happy:

cool mornings to sit and drink coffee, watching my daughter play and laugh, sweatpants.

Celebrate what makes you happy always,

Jenna/Starshine ✨